Miscellany

When Fear Takes Up Residence

September 6, 2012

“Worry does not empty tomorrow of its sorrow, it empties today of its strength.” ~ Corrie Ten Boom

I am writing this post after a fearful event. Therefore, today’s post is for me as much as for anyone else who struggles with worry.

Getting washed out to sea

My brother got washed out to sea today. It struck fear in all of us watching him float away, head bobbing through crashing waves. Helplessness engulfed me.

We ran, scrambled, called for help, and then waited and watched.

He came back to us shaken, but safe.

I couldn’t disperse the picture in my mind. All day I kept seeing my beloved brother in the water, in danger. It left me feeling helpless and afraid.

I felt fear spreading into my heart. Fear of what could have happened.

The fears take on strength of their own and start making up stories in my head. One leads to the next and pants and drools all over other areas in my mind.

It is a familiar feeling for me and one I have worked hard to dispel.

Smart fear verses plain old fear

There is a big difference between smart, cautionary fear and just plain old lingering fear and worry. The first seems to remain in a neat square box, ready and waiting to be opened and used. The latter is like mold. It spreads and grows on anything it can.

When it envelops my being, I am not the me I know I am. I am a worried version of me who misses out on life in the present.

So, what do you do when events in life strike fear and worry deep into your being? What do you do when it lingers? What do you do when it rolls into your head like a fog enveloping an open field? What do you do when it takes up room, room needed for thankfulness and freedom?

Do not worry about tomorrow’s burdens

Here is a quote which reminded me of something I had forgotten. Something very important.

“It has been well said that no man ever sank under the burden of the day. It is when tomorrow’s burden is added to the burden of today that the weight is more than a man can bear. Never load yourselves so, my friends. If you find yourselves so loaded, at least remember this: it is your own doing, not God’s. He begs you to leave the future to Him, and mind the present.”  ~ George MacDonald

Question: What have you found to be helpful when confronted with worry?

 

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  • Michael Wright September 6, 2012 at 6:34 am

    Remembering the words of the Bible “Fear Not” is the one (if not the most) common theme from God throughout.   If he says it so much, I guess it’s really important to believe it!  “Give us this day our DAILY bread”.  “Don’t worry about tomorrow…it has enough troubles…” – Jesus.   Knowing that there will be things happen out of our control, but knowing that it will work out.  God knows what is happening, he’s got the hairs on your head counted – and that’s not even important stuff. (Not to me anyways!)  He’s got the “big” things covered too.  Thank you for sharing your thoughts on the subject and GLAD your brother is OK.

    • Claudia Good September 7, 2012 at 11:08 pm

      Thanks for this Michael… always wonderful to hear again!

  • Donna Yates September 6, 2012 at 8:44 am

    Claudia,

    I am so sorry about what happened to your brother!  How frightening that had to be.  So glad it all turned out ok though and that he is safe.  I agree with Michael.  I try to remember what the Bible says about fear and not let it control me, but it is easier said than done.  However, just knowing God is with me does help no matter how great the fear is. 

    • Claudia Good September 7, 2012 at 11:06 pm

      It was frightening Donna! We are so thankful as well!

      You are so right… His presence always brings incredible peace

  • Ann Musico September 6, 2012 at 9:03 am

    Claudia – how frightening but thankfully you were able to share a happy ending!  And your post is so insightful – that statement – ” There is a big difference between smart, cautionary fear and just plain
    old lingering fear and worry. The first seems to remain in a neat square
    box, ready and waiting to be opened and used. The latter is like mold.
    It spreads and grows on anything it can.’  Wow!  You said volumes with that one statement!  Michael mentioned that scripture in Matthew 6:25-34 and that was what came to my mind immediately!  We can handle ANYTHING that comes our way if we simply trust God and take one day, one minute, one thing at a time and not overload our minds with worries about the future and “what ifs.”  Easier said than done sometimes, for me and most people.  But the old acronym “False Evidence Appearing Real” pulls me back to the present moment.  I also try and remind myself that most things I am afraid might happen – almost never do.

    • Michael Good September 6, 2012 at 6:15 pm

      Ann, I heard “false evidence appearing real” before as well. I think that a great phrase to keep in mind.
      In the Noticer, Andy Andrews had some stats of fear that I really enjoyed. It’s amazing how few of the things we’re fearful of we actually need to be concerned about.

  • Alana Mokma September 6, 2012 at 10:35 pm

    Oh man, I would have those images rolling through my head too if I had seen my sister getting washed out to sea! Wow. 

    I struggle with fear often (daily). I think what has helped me is when I start to feel the fear rising up within me, if I can keep a cool head I ask whether it is something to even be legitimately afraid of. For example, “Alana, is there really a man hiding in your closet that is going to get you while you are sleeping?” It sounds so ridiculous now, but sometimes I really fear this! 

    • Claudia Good September 7, 2012 at 11:11 pm

      I hear ya Alana! I like your approach, it puts it back into a factual place rather than just relying on emotions and imagination. Thanks!

  • Jody Berkey September 9, 2012 at 8:32 am

    I’m glad your brother was safe.  How scary.  

    My mom always said, “Will (whatever I was fretting about) matter five years from now.”  It put things in perspective.  More often than not, the answer was no and it freed me from the worry over silly things.  

    Have your brother wash out to sea, however, will have an impact five years from now.  Glad he’s safe 🙂

    • Michael Good September 9, 2012 at 8:24 pm

      That’s a great question to ask, Jody. Thanks for sharing!

    • Claudia Good September 9, 2012 at 8:41 pm

      Jody!!
      You are a commenting queen!! 🙂 awesome to see your smiling face on here! Thought of you guys while we were away! Hope your vacay was restful and less eventful than ours 😉

      and yes, we were sooooo thankful and relieved to see him on shore again!!! He stayed so calm and just rode the rip tide out and then some surfers helped him com in… phew!

  • Rob Clinton September 10, 2012 at 8:53 pm

    Wow, Claudia…. So glad to hear your brother is safe…

    I love your take on worry… I got to admit, I’m not always worry-free… It happens, when we do get concerned over what’s probably an illusion sometimes.  How the concern of tomorrow can be a burden on today was an awesome imagery. We’re not called to live both; we’re called to live now… I think reminding ourselves of that over and over is a habit forming behavior and through practice, we may learn more and more to let go, and let God.

    • Claudia Good September 12, 2012 at 10:38 pm

      We were and still are so thankful Rob! I now have a whole new respect and increased wisdom for the ocean!

      I think you are right when you say it is a habit that needs to be formed. I guess worrying is a learned habit to some extent as well… and can be unlearned.