I get asked by a lot of moms about balance. “How do you balance all the things?” “I don’t have the time to write, or blog, or paint like you do because of the kids and our schedule.”
The truth is, I don’t either.
The logistics of pursuing anything else other than wife, mother and co-running a business with my husband are complicated, to say the least. And balance is at best elusive (and I think we wast a lot of energy trying to find it).
I’ve found that time isn’t ACTUALLY the real issue, clarity is. What DO you want?
If you know what you want, then you find the time to pursue it. Period. Find clarity and you find time.
Life is painful when we don’t keep our dreams and passions alive. Thriving quickly fades into surviving when we are just doing the next thing and we take no time to pursue our dreams and talents. They make us authentically ALIVE and are vastly important!
It might not look like spending 20 or 30 hours a week pursuing things we enjoy, for me it looks like 30 minutes here and there through my day, or a few hours a week. I do this not because I have “time,” but because it fills me, I love it, and because I am ME when I do it.
It also looks like sharing responsibilities. Michael and I both pitch in and do all the things. We talk a LOT about our priorities and spend a lot of time getting clarity and setting goals for where we want to go in life.
And lastly, I have my own space. I have an office (and we live in a very small house)! I know very few moms with young children who have ANY space to themselves, let alone a whole room! You need a space to think and DREAM!
I decided to stop waiting for the logistics to line up, they don’t. Rather, I decided to make being the most ALIVE, WHOLE, PASSIONATE, ENERGETIC person I can be the MOST important rather than the least important.
I’d love to hear your thoughts here. What do You do to find space to dream?
Claudia, this is an amazing blog post and VERY true. If we wait till we have time, have all the stars in alignment….what we most want to do won’t get done. Having small kids is definitely a time and energy consuming reality. But putting those kids to bed early or down for a nap, or sending them outside to play for an hour is possible if it is important enough. You always have time for what is most important. Having your own space is also very helpful. Wise words from a very busy mom who knows she functions more effectively when she nurtures her creativity, Claudia!
Joanne,
Thank you! You’ve been there.
I am finding it amazing to look back over a span of a few years now and see what is possible when investing a little bit of time here and there. Of course there were some bigger slots mixed in, but I shall never again underestimate the power of clarity and perseverance again! The feeling of making progress on something you set out to do (no matter how little) is so life giving!
Love you!